A Prayer Request For My Poor Husband

I would like to send out a prayer request for my poor husband, who is suffering a great ordeal in our home.  On January 1st Pride and Prejudice came out on Netflix.  And as my college roommates can attest to, Pride and Prejudice is my absolute favorite movie in the history of ever.  (I once watched it in my dorm room for 24 hours straight.  That’s 11 times.)

The fact that it’s now available for me to watch constantly is creating considerable disorder in our home.  The first night everything was going well until the end, which is when I realized they CUT OUT THE LAST SCENE where the newly wed Darcy’s are on the balcony together.  I immediately called Nick, who was downstairs watching his purple team play the green team.  He arrived upstairs to an unconsolable wife.  I was crying so hard I couldn’t breathe.  (Looking back I realize it was probably mommy’s ‘special time’ of the month.)  I demanded Nick contact whomever was responsible for this awful blunder and claim vengeance for his emotionally wounded spouse.  I only allowed myself to be soothed when he promised he would.

Outside of that one very ‘excitable’ night, a few other things have changed.

Foreplay gets unbelievably formal and doesn’t work considering I’m wearing my wedding dress-the most elaborate gown I have.  That’s a lot of layers to work through.

I have started to cry out “Have you no consideration for my poor nerves??” when Nick refuses to bring me a snack in bed.  When Harrison needs to be cuddled to sleep I insist we “take a turn around the room”.  Also I may have said “What excellent boiled potatoes” as we ate carryout pizza one evening.

The hubs has certainly gotten the short stick, however.  I have been substituting his name with “Mr. Darcy!” unless I’m cross and then calling him “Mr. Collins.”  If he’s trying to tell me something I would rather not hear, like how he swallowed one of my hairs last night while sleeping and could I please control them, I have started simply responding “There’s something pleasant about your mouth when you speak.”  (I think it’s a genius system, but Nick is pretty insistent it has flaws.)

So I request that everyone pray for my husband’s patience and composure through this time of unpleasantness.  He’s a relatively tolerant man, my Mr. Darcy, but even the most noble gentlemen have their limits.

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